Monday, May 14, 2007

She Don't Need...The Glamorous Life

Yup - that's me - all glamor and sparkles...bwah.

At the beginning of the year, I earmarked this week for vacation to spend some time with my mom. Unfortunately, she couldn't come up for Mother's Day, but I still needed a week off. Since a surprise visit to see her would have cost more than our trip to Italy next year (for which we're saving pennies), I thought I'd stick to home. You wanna talk glamorous?

Today - slept in (well, that was TRULY decadent - haven't had a working Monday off for a year). Got up, walked, showered, checked email, then got ready for my appt at the dermatologist (nothing major - I just have lots of moles - we like to keep our eyes on the moles). Go to the grocery store - how unbefreakenly PLEASANT it is to shop during a weekday (when it's not double coupon day). Just a handful of moms and babies in the store - plenty of lanes open - wow. I need to do this more often. Totally changed my grocery-shopping experience...

Had a few hours to kill, so I shaved my cat's butt. Yes, you read that right. Our dear Milo, the great Impersonator-Of-Baby-Seals, had a vet appt today...

He's a portly fellow. Now before you folks point fingers at me for for feeding him too much - he was a thin alley cat for the first 5 years of his life. He could jump to the top of the refrigerator in one leap (and knocked many things off of it constantly). We moved here, and he just kind of got in a funk. Then he started gaining. We had two other cats at the time - both normal, healthy weights. Milo was just becoming The Fat Kid, and the others would mercilessly make fun of him (I'm anthropomorphizing, I know). So he got depressed. And husky.

He topped out at 20 lbs a few years ago, but he's been slowly getting back on track. Today he was only 17 - yay, Milo! In the meantime, when he's this big, it's hard to keep him clean. There are just spots he can't reach. So we clip the parts of his fur he can't really clean - which is mainly around his bootay. And that's how I spent my glamorous afternoon. Shaving his rear. Then taking him to the vet, where everyone applauded his recent 1.5 lb loss.

And now, on this glorious spring day, I think I'll retire to the porch with a cigar and a glass of sangria. Or five. Because I can. And it's a week day. And because I can. :)

4 comments:

Amy said...

I just have to mention how much I love the word "unbefreakenly."

Lorena said...

Me too!

And wowza-- you really live the high life, babe!

Eric K. said...

Milo says, "Hey! I'm not fat, I'm big-boned!" Could it simply be that he just eats everything in site? Remember, Milo was the one who would climb into the trash can when Joe and I were roommates in college. I would come home and open the lid to throw in the junk mail, and here would be this white face looking up, with a "Can I help you????" expression. Of course, there's the time we were all hanging out in the living room after an evening of wings and beer, and in strolls Milo, his white fur glistening - except around his head, which was orange as orange wing hot sauce can get! And again, the expression of "Hey guys! I've been a good kitty. I haven't done anything wrong today, despite what my face looks like...got any celery and bleu cheese?"

idyllicchick said...

I hope the rest of your week is just as exciting! Enjoy your self-time, Betharoopie!